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I am the only Sys Admin here where I work. There is one other employee that works in IT but she is considered to be an Admin Assistant. Her job role is to take care of all inventory and add/delete users as needed. She is in her 40s but may be the most immature adult I have ever met. I can’t say anything remotely negative around her as she will take it as I am picking on her. What makes it worse is that she and I will have what seems to be an adult conversation and she will then go back to her office and email me that she didn’t like how I was addressing her with certain issues. I have already asked HR about this and she referred me to my boss, who completely blew off the whole ordeal. My boss knows she is immature and just deals with it and she thinks that I should just deal with it.

I have been here nine months and she has been here 16 years. I don’t know how long I can put up with her immaturity and the lack of management just ignoring her. I have tried to ignore her but I have to work with her every single day.

Any suggestions or words of advice? I really like this job but I am considering looking elsewhere very soon…

30 Spice ups
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HR and your boss blew you off. Either deal with it or look elsewhere.

17 Spice ups
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Wall her off for any personal conversations. Just stick to business and stick to the facts. Also, communicate by email so there is a record of what is said so there is no he said she said stuff.

You’ve let your boss know, they are aware and apparently ok with this. Just make sure you dont end up in the hot seat.

Other than that there isnt much email to do, they have put up with her for 16 years, its not going to change most likely.

11 Spice ups
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I would just try to keep the communication to a minimum. Only talk about work related problems, and when possible use email. That way if she takes it the wrong way, you have evidence of what you said.

If that doesn’t work, I can understand moving on. Although, I would try to stay there for at least a year. It will look a little better on a resume.

Good luck!

7 Spice ups
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I know, it is obvious what to do here… but it just isn’t that easy.

3 Spice ups
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Sometimes the most obvious things to do in life are the hardest…

Well, how’s about this. Document every time for a month starting today. Give details. In a month, send an email with a formal complaint to your boss AND HR. Don’t bring it up casually. See what happens then.

If nothing, you have your answer. I suspect you already have your answer.

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Personally (Coming from the immature co-worker) I would say start getting worse. But lack of tenure may work against you. With all places you are going to encounter personalities that you do not like and that’s just the way it is. The 2 things here that you need to compare are is she being immature or unprofessional and evaluate yourself the same way. If she is being unprofessional then that is something to take up with HR, if she is just being immature, you’re probably just going to have to deal with it.

4 Spice ups
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If you are considering looking elsewhere very soon, I would try 1 last thing. Straight, Direct, Honest.
I would even do it with HR AND my boss there. Either way, you are considering looking elsewhere very soon. Now is as good as ever, but being very blunt works very good. Just remember that you can be blunt, straight, direct and honest while remaining polite and respectfull. Something along the lines: “You are a 40 year old and act like a kid and I don’t have time or desire to babysit you. Grow up or I am done.” This should get the conversation started. Simply put, open that can of worm and dump it on the table.

Sometime it takes this for people to finally change.

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Step one: Make sure she doesn’t have a SW and is reading this thread.

Step two: Don’t change jobs for small reasons, but if this is significant enough to post on SW, maybe it is time to look for something new.

Step three: IF you decide to stay, keep a six pack of beers in the fridge with her name on them. Those are reserved for days when she just drives you crazy.

3 Spice ups
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Excellent advice.

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Everywhere you work there will be something that is difficult to interact with. Rather than try and jump ship, I think it says more about our character if we are able to make the best out of things by sticking through it. In the long run, sure you may want to find something better, but don’t let a person be your sole reason for leaving, because there will always be another one.

5 Spice ups
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I would endorse your course of action, but not your example. That wording, to me, is neither polite nor respectful.

In the business world, it hurts a person professionally to address any difficulty with a thought that begins with ‘You’. Especially, when you know that nobody is on your side. Remember, until OP has the new job, this place is on his resume. And, future employers will call about a reference.

On second thought, management took a bad turn here. I would avoid the direct approach and just slip out the back door when the new job comes through.

3 Spice ups
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I really don’t like how you’re addressing me in this thread. Why are you so angry all the time?!

You should have fun with this. Maybe give her a taste of her own medicine and start sending her passive-aggressive emails about how you don’t like the sound she makes when she crumples paper. Or stirs her coffee. Or yawns too loudly.

3 Spice ups
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i was thinking exactly this. Being immature is one thing and can be ignored fairly easily. But being unprofessional is a real problem.

From the information given, it sounds like she is overly sensitive to workplace criticism and doesn’t take criticism well. This is immature but it is also unprofessional. I agree with other above that if she’s going to be like this, make sure all communication is written or has a written component. Just like an annual review is documented, any time you talk to her about her performance, you need to make sure the details are written and delivered. It’s harder to complain about tone in text if it’s a list of things to work on.

Sadly, if she’s been there 16 years and gotten away with this, documented deficiencies and failure to improve may not be enough to change things. If she works under you, but you don’t have the freedom to replace her, it’s either live with it or move on.

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We had to go through training on bullying at my last job and let me tell you that you do NOT want to bring up anything like this because she can turn it around say “here are my documented cases of people bullying me because _____” and turn it around to the co-workers being in the wrong.

It sucks because it puts people in an impossible spot at times, but its better to have a job than to get fired or sued.

1 Spice up
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If HR and your boss are blowing it off follow the CYA practices and document everything. If it doesn’t improve start looking.

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Agree with everything about being immature and/or unprofessional. Nothing people can usually do about immature. It’s when it is unprofessional and affecting work, client relations, etc that is a problem that has to be dealt with. If she is simply emailing you all the time that she doesn’t like something, I would just let her know, “I understand that you may have felt that way; however that was not nor will it ever be my intent. It is my job to review your work, your performance, training, and give instruction including, but not limited to, constructive criticism when it is warranted. If you feel my reviews are somehow biased or unprofessional, please take that up with hr as I will not discontinuing doing my job.” And then just delete (well, save in a designate folder to cover your butt) any other immature stuff she sends. If you are doing your job and being professional, then ignore the dumb stuff and anything she tries to escalate will only make her look bad.

Also, if you do her performance evals, incorporate her inability to receive instruction and training, her inability to work well with the department, etc. These are measurable, documentable things that are often parts of an eval, and at least that would give you a starting point.

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You haven’t given any indication of what you mean by “immature.” Nor any real examples of how she’s not doing her job.

You say that this 16-year veteran’s job is to maintain inventory and add/delete users as needed. So what do you, the brand-new 9-month old new hire, as sysadmin really have in mind that needs you and she to have “conversations” about “certain issues.”

Your characterizations include extremes like: “most immature,” “anything remotely,” and “completely blew off.” You’ve run to HR and your boss. Then, with all the wisdom that you’ve accrued in your 9 months there, decry, “I don’t know how long I can put up with her immaturity and the lack of management just ignoring her.”

How fortunate this firm is to have hired you. After only 9 months you already understand the other employees better than they do. And you are able to point out the flaws in their management style. It will be a shame, but I agree that you should look elsewhere for employment; go somewhere that will appreciate your unique abilities.

5 Spice ups
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BAM! That’s a really good point. All about perspective.

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The problem is that she is going beyond her job duties as I described in my initial post. She wants the company to think she is IT and can handle IT issues but when co-workers come to her for help, 95% time I have to come in and fix the issue. She has been told she needs to get some more education so she can move into a Sys Admin role but she refuses, stating that her high school education is enough and she is too old to go back to school.

One afternoon she set in with me as I called the local school district’s IT department to get help with something. The guy that helped me was awesome and very intelligent but he was almost impossible to understand because of his really country accent. After the call was over, all I said was “I wonder how many times people think he is stupid because of how redneck he sounds.” She laughed and thought it was funny. She leaves my office and then sends me an email rant of how I think she is redneck and stupid because she came from the country as well. Never once did I mention to her I think she is redneck or stupid. Now mind you, I grew up in a country town with one caution light, so her tirade holds no water with me. I don’t use my upbringing as a crutch as I did go onto college and get my degree along with certifications.

Another example is just yesterday a hard drive failed in one of the servers. I called and had them ship a new hard drive. I told her this morning about it and that I stayed at work an extra 45 minutes to get everything up and going. I didn’t mention her name in any of it. I get an email from her a little later that she had been here 16 years and she knew what to do. She thinks I was making her look bad and that she wanted me to know her feelings because it is important.

HR told me directly they know she is immature and to talk to my director. My director agrees she is immature, so I do understand her as well as the others do. The fault in the management style is that they are ignoring it, sticking their heads in the sand about it.

Robert5205 I get what you are saying… nice try with the sarcasm. I may be the brand new hire but I have been in IT for over 15 years now myself. This isn’t my first rodeo dealing with co-workers.

2 Spice ups