Amazon.com: Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More: 9781476709130: Mock, Janet: Books

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New York Times Bestseller • Winner of the 2015 WOMEN'S WAY Book Prize • Goodreads Best of 2014 Semi-Finalist • Books for a Better Life Award Finalist • Lambda Literary Award Finalist • Time Magazine “30 Most Influential People on the Internet” • American Library Association Stonewall Honor Book

In her profound and courageous New York Times bestseller, Janet Mock establishes herself as a resounding and inspirational voice for the transgender community—and anyone fighting to define themselves on their own terms.

With unflinching honesty and moving prose, Janet Mock relays her experiences of growing up young, multiracial, poor, and trans in America, offering readers accessible language while imparting vital insight about the unique challenges and vulnerabilities of a marginalized and misunderstood population. Though undoubtedly an account of one woman’s quest for self at all costs, Redefining Realness is a powerful vision of possibility and self-realization, pushing us all toward greater acceptance of one another—and of ourselves—showing as never before how to be unapologetic and real.

Editorial Reviews

Review

“Far too many assume that Janet Mock's story is primarily about her body. This book is irrefutable evidence that Janet must be understood through her intellect, spirit, and wit. Janet does what only great writers of autobiography accomplish—she tells a story of the self, which turns out to be a reflection of all humanity. You will be changed by this book.” -- Melissa Harris-Perry, Wake Forest University Professor and host of MSNBC's "Melissa Harris-Perry"

“Janet Mock is a glamorous, smarty-pants writer and activist…. Her book about her life as a transwoman, Redefining Realness, isn’t just a service to the trans community but to every woman – hell, person – who has struggled with identity.” -- Lena Dunham, actress and author of Not That Kind of Girl

“Courageous! Told with a spirit of raw honesty that moves beyond confession to redemptive revelation, this book is a life map for transformation—for changing minds. A heart-rending autobiography of love, longing, and fulfillment.” -- bell hooks, feminist, social activist, and author of All About Love

“Redefining Realness is a classic American autobiography. Like Richard Wright and Maya Angelou, Janet Mock brings us into a world we may not know and with breathtaking insight, courage, and masterful craft makes her story universal.” -- Barbara Smith, author of the Truth That Never Hurts: Writings on Race, Gender, and Freedom, co-founder of Kitchen Table: Women of Color Press

"Janet Mock’s groundbreaking book is testimony to the remarkable progress trans people have achieved over the last decade-- and shines a bright light on the work that still needs to be done. Mock’s clear, lucid prose will open hearts and minds, and further the goals of equality and justice--not just for trans people, but for everyone. Redefining Realness is loving, searing, and true." -- Jennifer Finney Boylan, author of She’s Not There and Stuck in the Middle With You

“Redefining Realness is a riveting, emotional, crisply written testimony. I couldn't put it down. I aspire to be as unflinchingly brave! Janet Mock's story simultaneously embodies, complicates, and subverts the concept of American exceptionalism and self-creation.” -- Laverne Cox, actress, advocate, and star of Orange Is the New Black

“Defining oneself is a revolutionary act, and, as described in her memoir, Janet Mock fiercely fought to free herself with exquisite bravery and sensitivity. Redefining Realness is full of hope, dreams, and determination. It is a true American girl story.” -- Michaela angela Davis, Image Activist/Writer/CNN Contributor

“Every Cinderella story has its problematic step-parents to maneuver around, and its metaphorical fireplaces to clean, before the heroine is whisked off to the ball. Janet Mock’s is no exception. But the real magic here is not of the fairy-tale kind. Redefining Realness overflows with the everyday magic of survival and resiliency in low income communities of color, of loving kindness bursting through the cracks of a hard reality, and of the life-sustaining bonds of family, friendships, and a powerful trans sisterhood.” -- Susan Stryker, author of Transgender History and Associate Professor of Gender and Women’s Studies and Director of the Institute for LGBT, University of Arizona

"Janet Mock's honest and sometimes searing journey is a rare and important look into la vida liminal, one that she manages to negotiate remarkably well, with grace, humor, and fierce grit. Mock doesn't only redefine what realness means to her, but challenges us to rethink our own perceptions of gender and sexuality, feminism and sisterhood, making this book a transcendent piece of American literature." -- Raquel Cepeda, author of Bird of Paradise: How I Became Latina

“An eye-opening and unapologetic story that is much greater than mere disclosure.... An enlightening, much-needed perspective on transgender identity.” ― Kirkus Reviews

“Mock defies the historically apolitical confines of the transgender memoir, and draws bright lines connecting her experiences to the larger realm of social justice, with a keen political eye that uses her individual experience to elucidate the wider condition of trans women of color in the U.S. Her vivid prose arouses every sense.... Although the book is ostensibly one woman’s coming-of-age story, Mock fulfills grander purposes here; in coming to terms with her own difficult journey she also uses that experience didactically, as if to take the uninitiated, non-transgender reader with her, most certainly achieving 'realness.'” ― Publishers Weekly

“...intelligent and educational…. Recommended for lovers of memoirs and for readers with sincere interest in the subject matter.” ― Library Journal

“A classic feminist coming-of-age story that’s worthy of your mantel. . . . Her memoir recounts a life that is both hardscrabble and hard-fought, making for a must-read book that is at turns riveting and wonderfully emotionally nuanced.” -- The Advocate

“Pardon the hyperbole, but Janet Mock may be the best person ever. . . . A beautiful, powerful memoir.” ― Rookie

“A fiery success.” ― The Atlantic

“The beauty of Mock’s memoir is that it is both personal and universal; her story is her own, but it also transcends the specificity of her life narrative to touch all of us.” ― Lambda Literary

“Redefining Realness is a rare autobiography in that it reads less like a memoir and more like a conversation with a homegirl. . . . [It] made me feel like I was on my couch with a friend sharing secrets rather than reading a carefully constructed narrative. That, I think, is a gift.” ― Crunk Feminist Collective

“Mock’s grace in handling complexity is matched by her frankness, and she talks race, class, and intersectional politics without ever sounding polemical.” ― The Rumpus

“Mock’s compelling memoir entrancingly chronicles the story of a multiracial trans woman’s becoming within a society that is still widely antagonistic to the non-White, non-male, transgender, and economically challenged among us. . . . Mock has written herself into herstory. And she has done so with clarity and poetic brilliance.” ― The Feminist Wire

“Janet Mock shares that which society tells us to keep secret . . . and uses it not only to strengthen herself, and empower other girls but also to educate.” ― For Books' Sake

“Here’s the short version of my review: go buy it and read it now. . . . Mock brings the same bravery and fierce determination that is evident in her history to the writing of the book, claiming her own story and making sure experiences that have often been used to dehumanize trans women and reduce us to our transition status instead serve to give the reader a more full and honest glimpse of her humanity.” ― Feministing

“Redefining Realness details a truly American story. Its poor heroine winning independence, success, and love through intelligence, determination, and hard work makes it timeless. Its portrait of a society grappling with issues of fragmented families, race, drug addiction, abuse, sex work, poverty, sexual orientation, and gender identity make it more timely and relevant than anyone expecting a ‘transgender memoir’ could possibly predict.” ― The Daily Dot

“A memoir that takes the coming-of-age narrative to both a higher and deeper level.” ― Slate

“It's fully intersectional, deliciously activist, wonderfully unapologetic, brazen, and beautiful. I love Mock's book because, like the best feminist reads, it’s really about the insight that telling stories can be a revolutionary act.” -- Laura Ciolkowski, Associate Director of the Center for the Study of Social Difference and Adjunct Associate Professor of English and Comparative Literature at Columbia University

About the Author

Janet Mock is a writer, TV host, and advocate tackling stigma through storytelling. With a Master’s in journalism from New York University, the Honolulu native began her career as an editor at People.com and went on to write cover stories for Marie Claire, Interview, and The Advocate as well as essays for The New Yorker, The New York Times, and Lenny. She produced HBO’s The Trans List, hosts the podcast Never Before, and serves as a columnist for Allure. Called a “fearless new voice” and “trailblazing leader” who “changed my way of thinking” by Oprah Winfrey, Janet was a featured speaker at the historic Women’s March on Washington. She is the author of Surpassing Certainty and the New York Times bestseller Redefining Realness. Find out more at JanetMock.com.

Product details

Publisher ‏ : ‎ Atria Books
Publication date ‏ : ‎ December 2, 2014
Edition ‏ : ‎ Reprint
Language ‏ : ‎ English
Print length ‏ : ‎ 288 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1476709130
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1476709130
Item Weight ‏ : ‎ 8.8 ounces
Dimensions ‏ : ‎ 0.87 x 5.47 x 8.31 inches

Best Sellers Rank: #106,751 in Books (See Top 100 in Books)
- #93 in LGBTQ+ Biographies (Books)
- #928 in Women's Biographies
- #2,277 in Memoirs (Books)

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Janet Mock
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Janet Mock wrote the New York Times bestseller Redefining Realness which tells the story of her trans girlhood, and hosts the podcast, "Never Before," a conversation series with guests like Tina Knowles Lawson, Representative Maxine Waters and Lena Dunham. In 2017, she wrote her second memoir, "Surpassing Certainty: What My Twenties Taught Me," which centers the years in her life when she was not open about being trans.
With a Masters in journalism from New York University, the Honolulu native worked as an editor at People.com, produced and conducted interviews for the HBO documentary "The Trans List", hosted a series of specials for MSNBC (including "So POPular!" and the upcoming "Beyond My Body" series) and appeared on OWN’s Super Soul Sunday -- in which Oprah Winfrey called her a “fearless new voice” and “trailblazing leader” who “changed my way of thinking.”
Janet has been lauded by the Ms. Foundation for Women, Planned Parenthood, the Sylvia Rivera Law Project and Time magazine which named her one of “the most influential people on the Internet.” The New York City-based writer is a contributing editor at ALLURE where she helms the column, "Beauty Beyond Binaries." Find out more at JANETMOCK.com
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Tenisha mock
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tenisha mock
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I am Tenisha of the true soulmate. mysteries in time series and many more books to come. I like book, the outdoor. animals [ especially dog, pancake and I mention books I am American living in England which is why my English is all mixed up, before I because of an author. I was a child club coordination for a church. my own book cooks up a blend of magic, history, and of course-; a lot of adventure. so if you're on the look own next epic adventure, you have come to the right place.
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Customers find this autobiography to be an extraordinarily honest account that offers tremendous insight into the heart and soul of the author's journey. The book is well-written, articulate, and moving, with one customer noting how it reflects the experiences of many trans people of color. Customers describe the writing style as unapologetic and witty, making it a must-read that customers find engaging.

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Story quality Readability Writing quality Honesty Transgender content Writing style Enjoyment Pacing

210 customers mention "Story quality"210 positive0 negative

Customers praise the book's story as an extraordinarily honest account that offers tremendous insight into the heart and soul, making it a very enlightening read.

"just got done reading this book and whew it’s like a warm hug through words and stories with reassurance that it gets better it’s validating and..." Read more

"..."Redefining Realness" evoked thought, compassion, and awareness - everything I expected based on the title of the book, as well as the..." Read more

"...expected issues with parents who just don't understand, introductions to the community, discovering who you are, and Mock switching back and forth..." Read more

"I just finished reading this VERY MOVING BIOGRAPHY that my best friend suggested, on a subject I knew NOTHING ABOUT...." Read more

176 customers mention "Readability"176 positive0 negative

Customers find the book readable and well-written, describing it as a must-read for everyone.

"..."Redefining Realness" is a masterpiece, not only because of the content, but because of Mock's incredible writing skills...." Read more

"...into themselves, and not just about the procedure, are in for a good read." Read more

"...MARGINALIZED by ignorance and prejudice may find Ms Mocks story well worth reading and their own lives enlightened by a subject that is basically..." Read more

"...She’s educated, articulate, and breathtakingly beautiful...." Read more

83 customers mention "Writing quality"78 positive5 negative

Customers praise the writing quality of the book, describing it as a masterfully written autobiography that is well written, articulate, and clear.

"...not only because of the content, but because of Mock's incredible writing skills...." Read more

"...book personally resonated with me, Redefining Realness is masterfully written prose that will speak to anyone looking to gain insight on the trans..." Read more

"...Her brilliance and determination is evident on the page and while she seems to stand apart from many of the Trans women of color who are inspired by..." Read more

"Redefining Realness is a heartwarming autobiography that is beautifully written..." Read more

79 customers mention "Honesty"79 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's honesty, describing it as a candid and truthful account of Janet Mock's journey of self-discovery.

"...through words and stories with reassurance that it gets better it’s validating and inspiring i love it!..." Read more

"...I appreciate her for using her unique story to inform, chastise, correct, and commend. That's what real women do...." Read more

"...of the human psychological experience that has been unknown but is VERY REAL and needs to be addressed and explored...." Read more

"Janet Mock speaks with a candid & straightforward intimacy...." Read more

42 customers mention "Transgender content"42 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the book's content about transgender experiences, particularly its exploration of the culture of transgender brothers and sisters. One customer notes how it reflects the experiences of many trans people of color, while another mentions how it helped with their own transition to trans adulthood.

"...This book is an excellent tool for parents of Trans kids or teens...." Read more

"...open and knowledgeable, but most of all more caring and loving to all gender differences,despite not personally dealing with any of the things I..." Read more

"...A must read for all trans allies." Read more

"...There are real people involved within the trans community, within the queer and cis communities...." Read more

16 customers mention "Writing style"16 positive0 negative

Customers appreciate the writing style of the book, describing it as unapologetic, heartfelt, and witty, with one customer noting it includes both laughter and tears.

"...On top of all of this, Mock made me laugh. Her quick wit provided a much-welcomed intermission from a stressful and, at times, unbelievable read...." Read more

"Ms. Mock handles her subject with the same wit, grace and dignity with which she has lived her life...." Read more

"...I was very surprised at how much I enjoyed Janet's writing and all of her details Definitely an excellent book to more fully appreciate the..." Read more

"Janet's writing style is eloquent, beautiful and authentic. I was especially struck by the raw honesty in her storytelling...." Read more

13 customers mention "Enjoyment"13 positive0 negative

Customers find the book engaging, with one mentioning its innate sense of self-motivation.

"...It was at once rewarding, revealing, and disturbing to read in full disclosure of her sex work--teen-age prostitution...." Read more

"...Janet Mock's 'coming of identity' is engaging, moving, frank, and educational...." Read more

"...to bring depth to the relationships in her life make this book an enjoyable and satisfying read...." Read more

"Janet writes in a way that excites, informs, and engages you!..." Read more

12 customers mention "Pacing"10 positive2 negative

Customers appreciate the book's pacing, describing it as moving and raw.

"...Janet Mock's 'coming of identity' is engaging, moving, frank, and educational...." Read more

"Great read. Moving and touching story - I learned a lot about trans people which is surprising considering I have a transgender family member and I..." Read more

"A beautiful, raw, unfiltered, inspirational account of a strong woman's journey through life...." Read more

"This book was so moving and real. I cried at so many points and appreciated the powerful discourse that Janet Mock embodied." Read more

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olivia
inspiring, validating!
Reviewed in the United States on June 4, 2025
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

just got done reading this book and whew it’s like a warm hug through words and stories with reassurance that it gets better it’s validating and inspiring i love it! it’s exactly the kind of book i need to be reading as a young trans woman barely entering my 20s

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K. Redd
Masterpiece!
Reviewed in the United States on February 20, 2014
Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase
"Redefining Realness" stirred up memories of my freshman year in college. During the spring semester, my English professor introduced the class to books by authors of subjects many of us had only heard of, but never even remotely experienced. Authors like E. Lynn Harris. His book "Just As I Am" sparked a fire in us that made us trample over other students hanging out in the quad, just to make it to the classroom in time to dissect the more than 380 pages of fictional sizzle. As we talked about the book and the issues it brought to the forefront, our discussions were filled with joy, anger, curiosity, and just a flat-out appreciation of Harris' writing skills.

This is how I felt while reading "Redefining Realness" - even before completing the first chapter. With my excitement level on "high", I wanted to immediately hightail it to someone's book club and talk about what I had just read!

This book is awesome. Janet Mock takes readers on the journey of her life as a trans woman of color - a journey that was as foreign to me as a map of the streets of Djibouti City. I honestly did not realize that the lives of transgender people were that intense (especially poor trans people of color). Thanks to media portrayals of trans men and women over the years, I likened them to "drag queens" and reduced their lives to simply being "people who like to play dress-up." To me, a person was either gay, lesbian, or straight. Nothing else. However, Mock's experience, passion, rawness, statistics, and transparency, taught me that the world does not fit neatly into compartments.

"Redefining Realness" evoked thought, compassion, and awareness - everything I expected based on the title of the book, as well as the publicity which has surrounded it over the last few months. I thoroughly enjoyed Mock's storytelling (story within a story), particularly the imagery she used to tell her story. Much like her "shero" Zora Neale Hurston, Mock's descriptive writing engaged all of the standard senses and more. I felt the winds and humidity of Oahu. I saw Charles, Sr.'s gold tooth with the Cowboys' shout-out. I touched Keisha's hair right along with Jamie. I heard conversations in Hawaiian pidgen on the streets as Janet and Wendi pooched. I tasted grandma's gumbo while eavesdropping on family gossip. (The pop music references sprinkled throughout the book made it even more "real" for me because I remember where I was when all of those songs debuted!)

On top of all of this, Mock made me laugh. Her quick wit provided a much-welcomed intermission from a stressful and, at times, unbelievable read. It was good to laugh to keep from crying. However, even in comedy, she managed to teach lessons. I'll never confuse a "drag queen" for a trans woman again because I now know "a drag queen is part-time for showtime. A trans woman is all the time." Love it!

"Redefining Realness" is a masterpiece, not only because of the content, but because of Mock's incredible writing skills. I appreciate her for using her unique story to inform, chastise, correct, and commend. That's what real women do.

I look forward to more work from Mock in any genre.

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Amari
If curious about Janet or what it means to be trans, this a good book to introduce you to the people behind the label
Reviewed in the United States on June 12, 2016
Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase
Consider this book almost like a 100 level course on what it means to be trans in the modern age. Now, be aware Janet's story isn't one which is all tears and fears followed by an eventual triumph. For while she did grow up in Hawaii and didn't have a middle-class family, it seems she was on the brink of poverty and never in the thick of it. With that said, though, you have your expected issues with parents who just don't understand, introductions to the community, discovering who you are, and Mock switching back and forth between educating you and speaking about her personal experiences. Thus giving you a book which feels well-rounded and while it may leave those curious about the process of transitioning unfulfilled, those who actually want to know the person and how they evolved into themselves, and not just about the procedure, are in for a good read.

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9 people found this helpful

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Lavado
THE HUMAN STAIN
Reviewed in the United States on June 3, 2015
Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase
I just finished reading this VERY MOVING BIOGRAPHY that my best friend suggested, on a subject I knew NOTHING ABOUT. I say nothing because I'd heard about it but knew NOTHING ABOUT..and I think it's safe to say that MOST PEOPLE KNOW NOTHING ABOUT IT. It was an education for me as it would be for anyone else who would want to know, whether your Transgender or just someone like myself, who wants to be informed about something that is just as REAL and SIGNIFICANT as a cure for cancer and aids would be.
It's a subject that many people choose to ignore because it doesn't affect their lives or anyone that they know. And the fact it concerns a young woman of color, that automatically dismisses it as INSIGNIFICANT. However..for those who wish to step out of the proverbial racist box and open themselves up to a subject that is important..may not only be moved by it, but enlightened about the struggles of Transgender individuals of ALL RACES,CREEDS AND RELIGIONS whom are constantly at risk from a society that chooses to PRETEND that this is just another sick and twisted homosexual deviance..I can assure you that it is SO NOT.
This is a subject that even psychologist and the entire medical profession is learning about. An area of the human psychological experience that has been unknown but is VERY REAL and needs to be addressed and explored. There is so much concerning human psychology that is still a mystery to the professionals that work in the field. This is just a small tip of a fathomless iceberg concerning the human condition.
But..for those who wish to be enlighten to a world that is constantly being MARGINALIZED by ignorance and prejudice may find Ms Mocks story well worth reading and their own lives enlightened by a subject that is basically unknown. I know I was.

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Alberto
Amazing
Reviewed in Mexico on December 4, 2017
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase

me encanto porque habla de su experiencia de una manera en la cual nos logran envolver a todos y sentirnos parte de ella. despuies de leerlo siento que la conozco de toda la vida.

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Bond
Five Stars
Reviewed in India on November 17, 2017
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
good......

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Max
Tolles Buch einer tollen Frau
Reviewed in Germany on April 7, 2020
Format: PaperbackVerified Purchase
Janet Mock ist eine großartige Persönlichkeit und ich habe dieses Buch gerne gelesen. Es gibt es auch in englischer Version als Audiobuch, von ihr selbst gelesen und das ist ebenfalls super!

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Chelsea Wendt
A smart and deeply personal book...
Reviewed in Canada on March 9, 2014
Format: HardcoverVerified Purchase
My copy of Janet Mock’s new Redefining Realness looks like a sticky note farm. She makes so many incisive remarks that I’ve had to take a lot of notes!

This woman is a force to be reckoned with. Not only has she bared her soul in this book, she has used that intense light to bring strong focus to problems and questions that face trans people everywhere, as well as issues facing poor and non-white trans people in particular. She is a good writer and storyteller and I read the book in a hot joy over the weekend.

Janet is clearly a feminist with a strong awareness of how our “choosing” to be feminine puts us in a particularly precarious position with regard to misogyny. We generally have to defend our right to express femininity. “It was a balancing act to express femininity in a world that is hostile toward it and frames femininity as artifice and fake, in opposition to masculinity, which often represents ‘realness.’”

I loved this book. It is deeply personal and heartfelt, yet she generalizes from her own experience to make remarks of deep insight. She is very up to date on trans and other related issues and covers many of them with strength and care.

Redefining Realness is certainly one of the most, and perhaps the most, useful trans autobiography I’ve read, and that’s a lot.

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Lola Phoenix
Incredibly Brave
Reviewed in the United Kingdom on February 18, 2014
Verified Purchase
Coming from a person who shares some commonalities with Janet Mock in experience, I can say that it takes a lot of courage to publish this type of honest and complete story of one's life. Not only does Janet talk about her own experiences, she puts them into context of the struggles that trans women of color face within society. She encourages you not only just to understand her point of view, but understand the points of view of her family and friends, reminding readers that there are many who have stories like Janet's. It takes a lot to be so open about things, to be honest, and to put it all out there. It was inspiring to read and I'm grateful that Janet has given so many people a glimpse of her life. It makes me feel confident that one day it will be less scary to tell my own story and I hope that it inspires others to tell theirs.

Thank you for such a wonderful book Janet!

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Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More Paperback – December 2, 2014

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5.0 out of 5 stars inspiring, validating!

5.0 out of 5 stars Masterpiece!

4.0 out of 5 stars If curious about Janet or what it means to be trans, this a good book to introduce you to the people behind the label

5.0 out of 5 stars THE HUMAN STAIN

Top reviews from other countries

5.0 out of 5 stars Amazing

5.0 out of 5 stars Five Stars

5.0 out of 5 stars Tolles Buch einer tollen Frau

5.0 out of 5 stars A smart and deeply personal book...

5.0 out of 5 stars Incredibly Brave

inspiring, validating!

Masterpiece!

If curious about Janet or what it means to be trans, this a good book to introduce you to the people behind the label

THE HUMAN STAIN

Amazing

Five Stars

Tolles Buch einer tollen Frau

A smart and deeply personal book...

Incredibly Brave